Saturday, August 28, 2010

Highs and lows..

So I am nearing my second month of being a certified nurse-midwife and while I still have some anxiety and doubt, it is lessening with each day. Last Monday I was first-call for the practice. That means I took all the phone calls and sent patients to the hospital as needed. Since I don't have privileges yet, that was the extent of my call. Easy, right? Well for most people it would be but this is me we are talking about. I only got paged four times..twice before 10pm and then again at 5 and 6 am. For most, that would mean a pretty good night's rest. Nope, not me. I was up nearly every hour checking the pager to make sure it was still on..neurotic, I know. So my clinic started Tuesday at 7am with one self-inflicted, groggy midwife but hey, might as well get used to not getting much sleep!

While waiting for hospital privileges to go through I have been reinstated "student" so that I can be proctored through some deliveries. So last Wednesday I had the joy of once again receiving babies into my was awesome but incredibly nerve-wracking. The first delivery was with one of my doctors, who I might say, loves to teach. This was good for me, but as most teachers and preceptors know..this can make it hard for you to step back and be the observer. We literally had just run into the room as this was the patient's third baby, so didn't have time for a game plan as to what was expected of me. Well, duh..deliver the baby right? As we both stood at the foot of the bed, both gowned and gloved, both watching and supporting the perineum..I was beginning to wonder if I was really supposed to "catch" or just observe. Turns out my doc was waiting for me to move her over out of my way, while I was simply waiting for her to move. I finally took initiative and positioned myself to be able to receive the baby easily. I must felt good to be back but was I sweating!! My second delivery was with one of my midwife coworkers (with Doc at nurses station) and it went well despite a very slight dystocia. (yep, lost another five years of my life to stress)

While I am anxious to be part of births again on a more regular basis, I have to say I thoroughly enjoy clinic. Educating patients on their health and simply listening to them is so rewarding. I have gotten to share in tears of joy and unfortunately, tears of sadness. To be able to comfort, educate and reassure is what makes my job so enjoyable. The month or so has been like the last three years of grad school on hyperdrive...abnormal Paps, STD screenings, menopause (which is getting less scary by the day), OB visits, preconception, contraception and vague pains that I must try to find solutions to. It all keeps me on my toes and I literally feel my mind going 100 miles per hour...but I love it. I have now been working long enough that I am having return visits of MY pregnant patients..nothing makes me smile more than my name on the chart under "Patient Provider."

1 comment:

  1. I am just so proud of you and happy for you. I think I might have yet another patient to send to you. This one is 2 months preg and just moved here. I always feel so secure in telling them they will be very well taken care of.

    Yay you!